Our Practice of Self-Love

Our true nature is love (Prema / Bhakti and so so so much more...)

And yet, somewhere along the way, we seem to have forgotten how to turn that love towards ourselves.

I believe that self-love is a little like a muscle. It is already there within us all, but it needs to be exercised, nurtured and strengthened. And one of the most beautiful ways we can do this is through the simple, everyday practice of self-care.

It sounds easy enough doesn’t it, to come home to our body, our mind our soul. To become fully present with ourselves and listen to what we truly need.

And yet, self-care can elude us and be surprisingly difficult to maintain.

It often feels much easier to notice everyone else’s needs before our own. We care for our partners, our children, our friends, our families, our pets. We care for our homes, our gardens, our cars and our possessions. We give, we organise, we provide, we make things happen.

And there is something deeply rewarding about making another person happy. Their smile can give us a sugar lump for the ego. We can experience something similar when we buy something beautiful, achieve something we are proud of, or receive admiration from someone else. Another little hit of sweetness.

What happens when our sense of worth and nourishment is continually looking outside of ourselves?

Perhaps it is time we remembered that self-care is not an indulgence. It is a human necessity.

How can we truly be there for the people we love if we are continually running on empty?  There is nothing to pour from an empty cup. Only a full cup can gift with abundance, surely.

So, today’s invitation, rather than asking “What does everyone else need from me?”, we gently ask:

“What do I need from me, for me?”

And we don't have to begin with anything complicated. Sit quietly. Take a breath. And ask…

“What is one small thing I could do right now for me that would feel good?”

Perhaps it is five minutes of silence. Perhaps it is a cup of tea, savoured rather than swallowed between tasks. Perhaps it is stepping outside and feeling the earth beneath our bare feet. Perhaps it is moving our body, breathing deeply, resting, dancing, singing, or simply giving ourself permission to do nothing at all.

Whatever it is, we should do it with all our whole heart. Not as another thing on the list to accomplish, but as an act of pure kindness towards ourself.

Little by little we begin to see when we care for ourselves in this way, something beautiful happens. We become more resourced, more present, more alive. Then this nourishment naturally begins to flow outwards into the way we meet our families, our friends, our communities and the world around us.

This is one of the reasons I practise yoga. And it is one of the reasons I choose to teach it. I am so looking forward to our up-coming yoga retreat in Wales where we are going to retreat even further into our inner love.

For me, yoga is not just a collection of physical and energectic postures. It is a map—a way of learning to navigate the landscape of our own inner world. A practice that brings us back into balance with body, with breath, with feelings, with mind, with our deeper self.

Through movement, stillness, breath, sound, silence and awareness, we begin to deeply listen. To notice. To feel. To realise.

And slowly, perhaps, we learn to distinguish between the noisy voice of the ego, the endless shoulds, musts, not enough, and what will they think? and recognise the quieter voice beneath it all. The voice that already knows. The voice that whispers rather than shouts. The voice that says you are home.

There is such a deep connection between the way we feel, the way we live and the way we inhabit our bodies. When we begin to care for ourselves as a whole, body, mind and spirit, we create the possibility for our greater wellbeing, greater balance and a deeper sense of connection.

This is the real gift of yoga. Not becoming someone different. But remembering the person we have always been beneath all the noise.

So today,

Let’s pause.

Sit quietly.

Close our eyes.

Take a deep breath.

And listen, not to the chattering voice that tells us what we should be doing, but to that deeper, quieter voice within.

Begin where we are, it is the only place to be.

And take one small, self-care loving step today.

Hari Om Tat Sat